Pet Humor

DOG LAUGHS
 

poodles "Whoever
said you can't buy happiness forgot about little puppies."
- Gene Hill

 poodles
"I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird
religious cult."
- Rita Rudner

poodles "Dogs
feel very strongly that they should always go with you in the car,

 in case the need should arise for them to bark
violently at nothing right in your ear."
- Dave Barry

poodles "Outside
of a dog, a book is probably man's best friend,

 and inside of a dog, it's too dark to read."
- Groucho Marx.

poodles "A
dog teaches a boy fidelity, perseverance, and to turn around three
times before lying down."
- Robert Benchley

poodles "Did
you ever walk into a room and forget why you walked in?

I think that is how dogs spend their lives."
- Sue Murphy

poodles "I
think animal testing is a terrible idea;

they get all nervous and give the wrong answers."
- Unknown

poodles "No
animal should ever jump up on the dining-room furniture

unless absolutely certain that he can hold his own
in the conversation."
- Fran Lebowitz

poodles "Ever
consider what they must think of us?

I mean, here we come back from a grocery store with
the most amazing haul:-
chicken, pork, half a cow.
They must think we're the greatest hunters on
earth!"
- Anne Tyler

poodles "Some
days you're the dog, some days you're the hydrant."
- Unknown

poodles "You
enter into a certain amount of madness when you marry a person
with pets."
- Nora Ephron

poodles "Don't
accept your dog's admiration as conclusive evidence that you are
wonderful."
- Ann Landers

poodles "Women
and cats will do as they please

and... men and dogs should relax and get used to
the idea."
- Robert A. Heinlein

poodles "There
is no psychiatrist in the world like a puppy licking your face."
- Ben Williams

poodles "When
a man's best friend is his dog,

that dog has a problem."
- Edward Abbey

poodles "Cat's
Motto:

No matter what you've done wrong,
 always try to make it look like the dog did it."
- Unknown

poodles "Money
will buy you a pretty good dog,

but it won't buy the wag of his tail..."
- Unknown

poodles "A
dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than he loves
himself."
- Josh Billings

poodles "Man
is a dog's idea of what God should be."
- Holbrook Jackson

poodles "The
average dog is a nicer person than the average person."
- Andrew A. Rooney

poodles "He
is your friend, your partner, your defender, your dog.

You are his life, his love, his leader.

poodles He
will be yours, faithful and true, to the last beat of his heart.
You owe it to him to be worthy of such devotion"
- Unknown

poodles "I
care not for a man's religion whose dog and cat are not the better
for it."
- Abraham Lincoln

poodles "I've
seen a look in dogs' eyes,

a quickly vanishing look of amazed contempt,
 and I am convinced that basically dogs think
humans are nuts."
- John Steinbeck

poodles "My
husband and I are either going to buy a dog or have a child.

We can't decide whether to ruin our carpets or ruin
our lives."
- Rita Rudner

poodles "It's
a dog eat dog world, and I'm wearing milk-bone underwear"
- Norm, on "Cheers"
 

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